Alright! The video isss awesome man! I love the music, dance and the way it potrays! Awww... Hey Taeyang, i cant believe that she wont take notice of you. Dont be sad, because you got me here to take you away and make you happy~ ^^ Gagaggaga. :P
But really.. you already know me and my personality of, 'I like guys who backs away just for the sake of his love one's happiness'~ (; Yea.. Like Shin (if im not wrong) in Princess Hours Korean Drama. HAHAHA :D
So anyway, i like the piano played in the music. Its niceee. I would love to play it if i know how to! -.- hehs.
Another thing. I think that the dance is cool! Sooo... Guess wad i did? I tried dancing out through the TUTORIAL! Yess. And man..i suck at it. Not much lah.. As in barelyyy~ Im not that flexible man..! Tsk tsk. Hmmph.
Somehow.. Part of me reminiscing thinking.. "Sheesshh.. i should have join Modern Dance for my cca instead of Choir." =.=" -even though i know my body flexibility. As in TO IMPROVE it lah, in the least. hahaha,
Blerrghhh.
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When i was young, i did ANYHOW in my Math Workbook home work, just to get it over and done with. There was a time, when my mum teaches me math till 1Am in the morning, scolding and caning me till i get it.
Hmm, people asked me.. What i always do. So i said.. I stayed home and manga. Besides that i go to work. Then they asked, You didnt go out? Boring right.. Stay at home? And im like.. Dumbfounded -.- Like WHAT? So not!
Really. Im not that bored staying at home. At least there's internet to read manga or surf the net. Then there's food at home. Come on i wont die (of boredom), at least.-Well, until there's no manga which will catch my interest. Im not like you who cant sit still at home.
I know that im just living in my own world right now till school starts exception of work. Yeah. Social life? Well.. Kinda a bit sucky right now. Because i dont go out-unless working. But thats not the issue. Its: Who the heck will join and go out with me? Its just that.. I didnt invite them and they didnt invite me. I mean.. Yeahh.. I gotta make the initiative to ask people "Lets go out". But really. Lazy. And last minute.
Oh yeah, there was this one time, where it was Ann's sis wedding in Tampines. So after the wedding i went off. So i went to Tampines Mall then Century square and watch a movie by myself called "Alice in Wonderland" -Which makes me yawn. So there you go. Alone.
Even if you ask me.. Why you go alone? Because i already ask people, then they say they're not free. So yeah.. Me and my no problem i can go myself attitude just went there and chill by myself. Is that wrong? Pathetic.. I guess so yeah.
Ok then there's another thing. About company. I think that my circle of friends are limited. Like really. Its hard to go out. As in there's always a clash between time/days.
Its frustrating. Ok whatever. ------
I think that reality is harsh. There's always the consequences and the things which you want to obtain but cant get it. Then there's fantasy. In fantasy, everything all seems nice. You do whatever you want and get whatever you want. Without any consequence happen.
Then i think about that. Well... Its nice to a certain extent-till you get tired of it. But its great when you can do whatever you want without any issues of consequences or punishment. However, when you reached reality. Everything just seems.. Goshh, it sucks. Like Yuck. Why did you even do that or think about it. Its not worth it.
Ok blahh. Bottomline, they're TWO different words and meanings. Hahs.
Yadayadayada, im complaining. Get a life? Well im already living it, L-O.
I had a sweet-weird dream just now. Hahaaa So the dream was... About Mr Cho! Ohh you know him.. The sensei had a crush on while in secondary.
In the dream... I dont know where.. When i saw him, without him knowing I crept from his back and suddenly jump and hug him, my hands around his neck! ^^ :D
Gyaaa.. He wasnt angry. Just the usual 'tsk tsk' look- yeahh, but i dont mind.. i just find it cute. So yeaap i was happy.
Then dont know somehow im in a clinic. AND Mr Cho was the doctor! =.= So he was taking blood pressure to the patient. I too, help him along-though somehow i felt as if im not good enough, in terms of skill. But he just let me do it and goodlah.
Im not sure, but it felt kinda hectic and busy. Then came in, another patient/person.. Saying that she wants ME to do her Fleet Enema at downstair level. But i was running out of time.. Because i got to go elsewhere (hospital/work maybe). Also my shared moments with Mr Cho, I still want to be with him... I was struck. The person went off- i signal for Mr Cho to do the fleet enema, AS my time was nearing soon!
Then now, it was time for me to go off-hurriedly. I was sad yet at the same time heart-wrenchingly painful that i have to be apart from him. But i gotta go, cause if not im late for work. But i was still happy to see him! So yeah its time. I went out of the door, my face looking at him. And him looking back at me with his usual 'ignorant' (or ahem* cute expression). And i left taking a taxi to a certain destination. While wishing that i could meet him again one day.
I read a manga just now. It was good. I like a story which makes me feel something!-like crying or heart pain, feeling hopeful and wishing for a happy ending etc.
I love you so much that every night i shout out your beautiful name to the distant stars- *Until the nice men come to take me way again
Nee-nor-nee-nor--- *ambulance*
Edward Monkton
Hahaha. Very cute! I like Edward Monkton's drawing story! Its cute. Hehe.
Yes, sometimes 'follow your heart' is scary!~~
Sometimes, i think that its nice if we're together. But somehow it makes me scared. Scared that you'll one day get tired of me, and leave me. Scared of your surrounding, your friends, and your everyday thing. Scared that i cant catch up to you. That is why.. I kept following the head and not the heart. Not wanting to repeat or to be disappointed then to a regret. Then the mind will ask, can you see.. You and him in your future? Can you handle and is ready for this so called relationship bond?
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Hmm.. Today ive gotten my result for sem 2. I got 2.569 for GPA. Hmmm.. Kinda the same as last semester result. Oh wells, not bad. Alhamdulillah (: ------
Hey heys. 2 weeks ago in my polyclinic attachment, on that last day, which is on Friday.. I was posted to the antenatal and postnatal care room for pregnant mum and papsmear examination.
So yeahh.. Ok lah. Papsmear and cervix... hmm Oh man.. haha. Ouch? :P Oh wells, asyura youre still innocent. And that thing hopefully and pray hard you do it when you get married! hoho.
Oh yeah! The doctor let me touch Fundal Height! And i got to see how many weeks the mum is just by measuring from her Symphasis pubis to the fundal height! Awwweeesomee~~
Anyway! I had a chat with the senior midwife! I asked her:If a woman had sex with her husband, then she got pregnant.. Then 1 to 3 weeks later she had sex again, IS there a POSSIBILITY of her having a TWINS! ? :DDD She answered:It is possible. But it is rare. Also the 2 child will.. One of them be a girl and another is a boy. This happens because sometimes a woman can ovulate two times.
Weeeeeees~~ I wannaa tryyyy that! Because i wanna have twins! :D -when i get married of course. Hehehe.
Oh yeahh.. This reminds me of the ayat "Kun Fayakun.." It meant, if God wants it to happen, maka jadilah sesuatu itu. Aww (:
and to that person, if you manage to read this then takecare of yourself. ive always been missing you. counting down to the days. remembering the memories. trying to takecare of myself. thinking of you. thinking of your health. thinking how well you are coping. thinking of your words. thinking of the advice. you are on my mind constantly. and now, its very very hard. im aching, im hurt so deep i feel so weak i just dont want to stand anymore. ive not much motivation now. idk what else to do. i miss you so very much. i really dont know. im clueless. im lost. im weak. im almost nothing without you. all the strength i have is because i know you would be sad and disappointed in me if i fall and never want to stand. you'd be angry if i didnt want to try but you would encourage me cause you care. you still do. i guess? i miss you but we have to deal with it. im not going to give up. im doing all this cause i know you still care and you want the best for me. thankyou. and dont worry about me. i'd be alright somehow. missing you terribly.
I understand what she meant, clearly & deeply. (:
:'( You’ll be alright and I’ll be alright.
At one point in time, somehow I felt lonely and EMPTY. Missing and tripping over you. Ive been trying to take care of myself. Thinking of all those happy memories and positive views about life. But its hard. I keep on falling then standing up again, feeling very shagged each and everytime. I tried to be strong in looking forward to another day and Today.
Have you ever feel like falling down or feel like wanting to faint when youre up and walking through everyday life? But, however, you told yourself to HOLD on and just start walking walking walking.
I guess I just don’t wanna break down so hard. Because I find myself wondering, will you come and save me when I fall? There’s this saying, about a guy saying, he was there to catch the girl when she was falling down. and the girl saying, you wasn’t there when I fall. However, the guy answered that, She had already catches up the vine roots holding and not wanting to fall down deeper, thus climbing up again.
It makes me think, WHO is the guy? & I think that the girl, she’s very independent, not wanting to fall. (:
So while waiting for time to pass by for work, i chilled at HMV. There was this BOOK I read. Its quite a short amt of page. & ITS VERY VERYCUTE! -Its like a short phrase, about Love. The drawing and the phrases makes me Awww sweet... & HAHA!.. ^^ I wished i had write down what the book says, and remembered the author's name.
Tch Tch. One day then, when im up to it, though i dont really wanna buy it. Hehs.
Because really.. Some pages make me laugh, Some like Aww, Some are corny! Haha. But mostly, they make me think of how wonderful it is to give this to your other person to cheer them up or just having a laughs. haha :D
I smile alot today. Prettayyee woman~~ ;D ------
Dear God, I love you more than yesterday. Because today's event makes me happy. Thank you. ((:
Hees. I think that the Words above are cute! Alright, wassup with me and my many cute-ness comments? Haha.
So are you wondering if im in love? I dont know. Because i havent found the ONE person yet. (: -I'll just wait patiently then.
But the WORDS above, is True! Its not a person i miss. Its when Love knocking right through your heart.
Hmmm i think im being stupid and cheesy about this love issue thing. Yeaa. XD
Me and my heart we got issues, Don’t know if I should hate you or miss you, Damn, I wish that I could resist you, Can't decide if I should leave you or kiss you. Me and my heart we got issues, issues, issues. The Saturdays - Issues
Cause I remember every word that you said It all just keeps spinning around in my head But it don't matter what I try to do I keep on forgetting to forget about you And I don't want to think about you baby so much All the things we did and the way that we touched Just when I think about someone new I keep on forgetting to forget about you Forget about you, forget about Watch me turn around and forget, forget about you Forget about me and you
A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past.
A longing for something far away or long ago or for former happy circumstances
The condition of being homesick; homesickness.
(taken from answers.com & yourdictionary.com)
nostalgia nos·tal·gi·a ; n. nostalgic nos·tal'gic ; adj.
"Baby i can see your halo You know you're my saving grace You're everything i need and more It's written all over your face Baby i can feel your halo Pray it won't fade away "
Beyonce- Halo -I just feel like saying it. Haha.
Your touch, your skin, can't believe the way you let me in Don't rush tonight, I need you like the ocean needs the tide.
Didn't wanna want you Didn't wanna need you so bad Didn't wanna wake up And find that I was falling so fast Didn't wanna need you Didn't wanna need anyone Now look what you've done
Now I can't go on without you I'm naked, I cant fake it. I'm not that strong without you Never thought I could love you the way I do.
I always thought I would stand on my own Climb a mountain top all alone Relying, depending on no one Now look at what you've done
I love you I need you I want you ..the way I do Marcos hernandez - The way I do
My top favourite songs currently: (May not be in order)
JoJo - Keep forgetting (to forget about you)
Cheryl Cole - Fight for this love
Mariah carey (ft all many artistes) - Just stand up
Ello - Masih ada
Beyonce- Halo
Marcos Hernandez - The way i do
The saturdays - Issues
Big Bang - Haru haru
Alicia Keys- No one
Jay Sean(ft Lil Wayne) - Down
Hijau Daun - Cobalah
Peterpan - Menghapus jejakmu
Peterpan - Mungkin nanti
The Lucky Laki-Laki - Bukan superman
-That should be it haha.
They says, songs describes what you are feeling about or even your personality state. Haha. So tell me what do you find in me then, Mr Psychologist?~~
------ 4 WORDS on Nostalgia (today): Bedok, traffic, McD, Akon's song-Beautiful.
------ Today attachment, i was put to the immunisation room. It was nice/alright seeing the kids. I learnt a few things there so yeahh (:
There was this mum bringing her 2 boys, kids. The lil one, is due for an injection, another, the big brother was brought along too. It seems that big brother keeps on fidgeting around along with the lil one.. Energetic and restless wanting to let go and being free. I think that its cute and seeing how mum's wants her childrens to behave. Haha. I think that kids will be kids! :D So let them free as long as theyre not hurt or at least not distracting others. Hehe.
So once the needle are prepared, i asked big brother to come to me while motioning towards me. THEN WE HOLD HANDS! :DDDD gagagaa. Big brother just kept holding my hand and me too not wanting to let go! *kawaii~* Big brother stand still and stared while curiously and quietly behaving himself while looking at the nurse inject his lil brother, however the procedure cant be seen as it is block by the nurse's back. So minimal vision of IM injection-which is good, so that it wont scare the child.
The cutest part and the awwww part was when.. After finishing, walking out the door, Big brother walks towards mum and we let go of each other. While knowing that the child and mum are gonna be out of the room, Big brother turns towards me.. AND he WAVES goodbye to me! :D Yeaaa.. That was really cute. It feels as if attached and appreciation was there. Weees~~ (((:
It was nice! ------
I used to be really in love with Peterpan because of their songs. Though at certain periods of time i didnt listen to their song but still i like their songs. You can say it brings back memories, or the songs have stories i can relate to as well as the music is soothing or nice to listen to. Hees.
From 6 members, now left with 4.
Ive ALWAYS loveeees ARIEL! hahahha :D Till now? Probably.
•Sometimes, i find myself saying to myself : Adri do you know, that, i (still) loves you? Those memories, time spent, gift given, i treasure them all.
Then do you know, i find myself saying : If only we try hard enough. If only... Maybe it wasnt meant to be. Maybe in the first place we aren't compatible enough. Maybe in the first place we were too young and were rushing?
Then i ask myself this : How about NOW? Am i still loving you? Im not sure myself, though. Maybe to a certain extent? & maybe on some conditions/basis.
NO! I DONT KNOW. I dont regret meeting you, knowing you, being with you, talking with you, being happy with you! Really. It was all a very happy moments for me whenever i think about it.
How about you ? Are you happy now ? (: -i hope you are smiling baby.
A few (or long) weeks ago, when we met coincidentally with each other near the Bugis staircase. Do you know, how happy I was to see you once again!? Really really happy!
Alright alright im just saying. Maybe i missed those times of how we used to be. Hehe (:
I dont wanna say that those times, no matter bitter sweet, are just one of my past. I just feel that those moments are wonderful memories, treasured time spent with someone I dearly love(d). & I dont like the idea of calling you an Ex. Beause you're someone special! I would prefer calling you.. What do you think? Flourescent? haha ;D
Thats why, when someone asked me how's my love-life. I can just easily and happily says that, it was all too wonderful. Good times i had -With a smile on my face. (:
Haha. Hmmm so why am i suddenly writing this? Well, i clean my drawer and i saw some items. So yeah. & they reminded me of you.
You can call this a tribute to you. Wees~~ I love you baby! -once upon a time (: Thank you, love.
*I keep on forgetting to forget about you. -by JoJo. ~baby it's true. ------ What i meant by squishy is yeaap. I'll hug you alot!
•
Dear God, Once again the speculation. What did i do wrong?
Like what i learnt in madrasah today, by yours truly Ustazah Haslinda. Haha.-Oh my god, yes yes God! :D Bottom line: No matter what, ada terdapatnya Orang yang masih tidak dapat menerima diri kita sendiri.
Then she says about, lalu dia bermuhasabah diri sendiri, fikirkan apa yang berlaku. Dan ketika perlakuan atau perbuatan itu diubah kepada yang baru lalu dibuatnya, namun mereka masih tidak dapat menerimanya, maka kita berlalulah dari situ. Hmmm...
Well it makes me think some stuffs.
Tapikan! Yang kesiannya atau aibnya! Lalu ada yang berkata bahawa ajaran beliau merepeklah, out of topiclah etc. Namun, kenapa apabila ustazah bersyarah Asyura sendiri boleh faham dan berasa isinya releven dan menepati?! Sementelah beliau telah mengajarkan ajarannya dengan dibagikan dalam sudut konteks 'fikiran anak remaja'. Mungkin kah ini tidak berkesan? Jika tidak berkesan, mengapa Asyura dapat memahami pelajarannya itu? -well, i guess lain orang, lain rasa, lain hati. I think that this is SAD. Cause they dont/cant accept it. Sad towards the cikgu and sad towards the humanity.
& should i dwell on this again? -I DONT WANT TO LAH! Entahlah.~
You know the phrase "Biarlah masa yang menentukannya". Sometimes rasa macam tak guna menunggukan masa. *Boo! ------ See the sora? im dissappointed
Today in Fiqh juga, Ustaz Abu Bakar-yang ajar kita bab Fiqh dalam munakahat. Dia tanya kita sesuatu soalan, cuma ingin pandangan dari murid-murid.
"Jika Isteri/Suami kamu masuk penjara. Lalu dia memang guilty/bersalah dalam criminal act. Apakah kamu sebagai Isteri/Suami akan lakukan? Ingin menunggunya atau fasakh(pisah) perkahwinan ini?".
There were few answers. Mostly says, ikutkan emotion at that point of time dulu.
But there's this one guy nama, Sheik, dia kata "Tunggu isteri itu sampai dia keluar penjara." Ustaz lagi tanya.."Abeh kalau dia buat lagi... Berapa kali awak nak buat begitu?". Sheik kata"3 kali(last/max)." -im like.. hah. Dont know lah if want to believe or not. But if thats true, then untung siape dapat Sheik Muhyidden yea? hehe (: Bagus lah begitu.
Then for me, this wasnt much of a hard question. Cause i already know what my answer(s) will be. Answer: Jika masih ada perasaan cinta padanya(or even simpati/chance) Asyura akan tunggu dia keluar. Maka asyura akan bersabar. Tetapi, at any point in time, where i feel burdened and feel like letting go cause i cant take it anymore which then if one day a new Guy appear, i shall rethink my decision. Weighing if the new guy or this current husband can bring happiness to me (or even to my childrens if i have).
Because, in this kind of situation even if you stay or cerai, it still a win-win situation-so called. As in 'Its for the best'.
Like tidak mahu menunggu husband, sebab nafsu batin or zahir tidak dapat diberikan. Lalu payahnya hendak mendidik anak. Or even feeling of incomplete!
Then about marrying new husband. Because i need to be in an intimate relationship with someone so that i can feel complete-eventhough i dah bersabar in the first place. And if this is best for my childrens. And with new husband dalam melakukan tanggungjawab sebagai suami yang telah diberi amanah kepadanya.
SO yeah, there goes my opinion. Cool. Kinda easy question to answer. Haha. Though i know that in situations for me to change my surrounding, i know that i must push myself to get the ball rolling. (; Cheyy. ------
Trololololololo. If you're beautiful, then i'm gorgeous! Hi darl. (:
I loves the rain, seeing the raindrops from my window.
Staring up at the big blue sky, laying down.
7:18 PM
Wednesday, March 31, 2010 back to top?
Trololololololo. If you're beautiful, then i'm gorgeous! Hi darl. (:
