3:46 AM Saturday, January 8, 2011 back to top?

• Im holding, hugging and kissing this cute and huggable snowy-white-colour-with-silver- heart-shaped-on its belly- as if it is YOU i was doing all those things! Haha ;D

I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you like crazy.

I wish you were here with me now. & i pray that you are well and OK.
& i hope you'd tell me the reason for this silence and tell me what's on your mind lately.
I wish you know that I Love You and that i dont want this feeling to end. But if it will end one day, i will sincerely let go of this feeling. Because I thank god for having you come into my life. & also, if you wanna end this relationship please let it be clear and that we "break up" in a nice and good way & thus in the future if we were ever coincidentally meet up with each other i hope we would smile happily with one another.

But of course i dont want us to end. Because this feelings, ive been waiting so long for it to come and surrounds me warmly. & finally it came.
It would be sad if i were to let this feelings go. All those moments we spent together, the late night phonecalls, the waiting and walking with each other after work together, talking about our days and lives, holding hands, and the whenever we parted you'd always gives me a kiss which i think its sweet and i like that *hehe* and umm.. Well the cute and huggable carebear you gave me which i always says that the cute carebear is much better than you, whereby i would jokingly say that, "Youre not cute, not tall, not adorable, not huggable enough", just to tease you.
But one thing you should now is that... I love the way you are.

So anyway, HURRYY UP and call or meet me AND say that You love me too & that everything will be alright! Ok baby?

With lots&lots of love FOR YOU,
Asyura.

P.S: I wanna be your girlfriend. Itu pun kalau awak sudi. Hehehe.
Tapi kena propose in a romantic and cute wayy which would make me geli hati! hehehe. :P

P.S.S: Another day passed without you... maybe there's a lot of things in your mind, and maybe I am disturbing you.. I'm sorry. So I'm giving you time and space to think about. I'll wait for you till you're ready to tell me -you know you can tell me anything right? I will always be there for you. But please don't let me wait too long, or else I will be sad.

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Hahaha. Its like a love letter im writing.
HAHAHA. SOOO CUTEEE! ;D

7:47 PM Tuesday, January 4, 2011 back to top?

• Dan tanyalah pada hati, jikalau perasaan itu masih ada?

2:18 PM back to top?

• Im starting to wonder if this Love was ours in the first place?

5:04 PM Saturday, January 1, 2011 back to top?

• Hmm lets see,

31st December:
I got a call from my colleague feeqah. Who asked me to cover for her work at Tiong bahru, since she was sick.
Then i msged Z-carebear asking him what i should do since im caught in the between and that we supposedly plan on going countdown together. But he didnt reply.
So i said ok in working at FA in TB, since feeqah have done a lot of things for me. So to repay back her kindness.

At home, help kemas rumah and i masak tom yum, sadly the next day which is today basi already. Geez.
Oh yeah, mum asked me to buy a prengnancy test kit for her. OMGG. The seller was looking at me some kind sia! Haha. -But mum isnt pregnant in the end. HAHA!

Anyway, went to work at TB.
Meet old colleague Jing Jing, where we onced worjed at Bugis.
Had quite an amusement there. Listening with all her complaints, the yoghurt incident etc. Haha.
Not forgetting, there was this Orang lelaki, melayu, tapi dia kerja angkat tong sampah.
WHICH I THINK HE IS QUITE HOT! haha.
I msged feeqah about him, apparently she does admit he is quite hot lah. HAHA.
The "Strip away the prejudice, and you'll get a totally hot and lovable boyfriend!", which i msged to her. HAHA.
While the guy was there, i asked JingJing about Lysiel flying off back to Philippines. She says Lysiel went off today already. And i was like Huhhh?? I thought FRIDAY! Jingjing says "Siao are you! Today Friday right!". HAHAHA.
The hot garbage man listened to our conversation and laughed, and wished "Happy new year to you!" and he went off. HAHA.

All the way during work, i was wishing for work to end faster, missing that one person. Wondering if we'd meet up and go countdown together. However i didnt msged him while i was at work, wishing he would msg me first, but he didnt.

Work ended. Changed clothes and went to City hall, headed towards Marina Square.
I finally msged him saying, 'What he doing now' & 'Where are you?' msg.
City hall was crowded, i hate the barrier but i just walked on. Finally i reached Marina square.
Bought double chocolate from McCafe, the nice looking smile hot guy was there serving me. Hehe.

Had a text msg from Z-Carebear. He msged that he isnt going to the countdown since its late and tomorrow he got work. I replied, have he gone home already? He said yes. And there he goes.
I was dumbfounded, pissed and upset at the situation.
Come on la.. At least msged me earlier in the first place if he wants to cancel the plan. Now look, here i am ALREADY at Marina Square itself coming from Tiong Bahru just to meet up with him, but he's already gone. What the hell i should say. Sigh, i was sad but i dont wanna keep my mood down.
Baby, was i Ditched? God knows, its ok. Im fine if im alone.

Both my sisters msged me, asking me to go down to Airport. Thanks but i am already in Cityhall.. So i should spent my time wisely seeing the fireworks, the water, the balls in the water and the sky right? Just enjoying the beautiful moment.

With a sad heart full of lots of questions i walked through the crowds of people.
I sat near the Marina Square staircase for awhile, but my heart wanted to go to the Esplanade water. So i walked, but the barrier stop us crowds from going forward. I made a detour, and thank god the policemen was kind enough to let me in.

I reached Esplanade and the Fireworks started already. Eventhough the fireworks was blocked by the trees infront of me, i was still contented. Its ok, maybe next time then (:
I took photos. The fireworks were pretty cool.
The fireworks then ended and people started moving.

I walked the bridge heading towards the Merlion. Finally i found a resting place.
So i sat down near the waters. Just looking at the scenery infront of me. Time passed by without me knowing.
I felt quite weird, because i was by myself, whereas all the others have companions.
But its ok. At least by myself, it really makes me feel serenity. Haha. Dont know why.. That kinda feeling, just the way it is. Hehe.
I msged Z-Carebear a Happy New Year. Maybe he's already asleep by then. Its ok.

Hmm after long enough sitting and looking, i headed to the Cityhall mrt.
I like how im always walking faster than the others and cutting through and slicing people. Haha. Selit-menyelit. Lols.

Took the train and head home.

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Thinking back, lots of things have happened to me.
From strangers we became Friends. Its pretty cool, how life is instore for us.
Terima Kasih, Ya Allah. For letting me feel all those beautiful moments.
And we walk on in life.

3:30 AM back to top?

• Dearest kekasih,

Aku rindu dia.
Namun aku takut jikalau dia bukanlah takdir bagiku.
Mungkinkah dia terbaik bagi yang lain, aku tidak tahu.

Jika cinta ini terus berkembang, akan aku memeluk kehadiran cinta ini dengan sepenuh hatiku.

Dan apabila, jika aku terlalu mencintainya namun hatinya sudah pudar, akan aku berasa sedih dan pilu rasanya.
Sekian aku akan bebaskannya pergi. Pergi jauh, jauh dariku, jauh dari hatiku.

Dan apabila, cintaku ini dibalas olehnya, akan aku memeluknya dengan pelukan yang ketat. Tak ingin ku berpaling darinya. Akan aku membuatnya gembira dan senang hati dengan kehadiranku. Akan aku menyayaingi dan mencintainya sedalam-dalam hatiku. Tiada kata yang dapat ku ungkapkan jika cinta ini dibalas dan inilah takdir kita.

Kini aku hanya menanti. Menanti masa ketika perasaan cinta ini berkembang mekar.
Di suatu hari mungkin tercatat; "Cerita tentang kau dan aku".

Aku rindumu..

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PSST: Ive just realised after reading this, it sounds soo corny! haha. omgg.