12:16 AM Saturday, March 19, 2011 back to top?

• I dont know...
I kept on thinking and thinking if he's right for me, then ive made my decision but in the end, i fall apart again.

Someone says that, The period between waiting and moving on is the hardest part.
Cause youre waiting for someone who may never come back to you again. Ah.... But what if he does come back? Then there's the moving on and leaving him behind. But what if.. You've moved on already, but while you left the scene, he finally reached the place- Missed Cross-path. How?

Yesterday 17 March, after a long time of waiting and not contacting...
Somehow, after finishing work.. I felt lonely. Because i miss someone.
Someone who have always walked beside me, holding my hands -meeting me after work, while making our way towards the train station.

17 march, 1054pm:
I loved and miss those moments where you wait for me after work, as it makes me look forward to meeting you. Where we would walk together, holding hands, and just talk. Those feelings and moments I missed,
Now without you, it feels lonely. :(

At the same time, im wishing for that someone whom "I will always be there for you when you need me" person.
That someone who is spontaneously there for me when i need him. Because right now,i feel lonely. As if there was no one i could hope and turn to. It was always me, by myself being with me.

It's like that day, a few days ago...
I was struggling if i should meet him after his work, or go to Marina Barrage just to calm my struggling self.
In the end, i was toooo Afraid to face up to him. So i ran away, and went to Marina Barrage alone by myself, in the night even.
Yeaaa.. I noe its sooo ridiculous to go alone by myself in the late night... But i was tooo pompous! I couldnt wait, because my inner self have been killing me inside.
I need to calm myself.

& YES, looking up at the skies, the cloud, the cool air breeze wind sweeping me.. Really do makes me happy. I was thankful and i thanked God, that i went to Marina Barrage safely and that it calms my raging self.